I've started working at Breville. Breville!?! It's crazy. Who would have ever thought?? It's really strange to think that I work at such a big company. I definitely did not ever think I would do so - and yet, it seems so fitting? Or at least it's definitely somewhere which people could picture me at. "It's to do with food", people will say.
And yet I honestly don't even think I resonate with food that much anymore. It's not something that I crave, or that I really go for. Nowadays it's more about meeting up with people. Getting human interaction. Maybe because I've been by myself for so long? I just want to talk to someone. And actually have a decent conversation. And yet all the conversations these days (and rightly so, I guess) is about babies, houses, where to live, how far you drive to commute. I'm thankful for Sharon to be honest. I'm so glad she is also single and not about to get married or dating anyone. I'm thankful that I have another friend to commiserate with. I guess I'm pretty excited about my team at Breville now. I' still pretty concerned that I won't be able to do well. Or that I'll somehow let the team down. Or that I'll come across as an idiot who knows nothing. They say confidence is key, but somehow I don't think that's true. I've come across so many people who have had confidence but don't know their stuff. And I've come across people who don't have any confidence but are the smartest people in the room.
And yet, Jeremy was right. The world rewards the extroverted. And so you learn to adapt.
I'm always really conscious of the fact that Gloria says my voice goes higher. Or that I put on a higher voice. Liam also said that my voice got higher after Korea. I swear it's not a conscious thing. It's just that it's so much easier to be 'me' - low voice, sassy, dismissive - with people who also get it. It's called learning to adapt. Is that a bad thing? I don't necessarily think so. My demeanour changes depending on who I'm with. And I guess that's a by product of me trying to make friends wherever I go - seeing as I had so few when I was younger.
